Joanne Lam

Life is merely a series of fleeting moments.

I have probably written about this time and time again, or you’ve read articles on a similar topic and might be tired of it- but it’s important to me- thus, I hope it will be important and refreshing for some of you as well. From the very beginning, we all have begun our search for the meaning of life. Throughout our life, we experience moments that begin to put our life into perspective, and then we start to think we understand, but little do we comprehend- that the moments that really impact us- are those we never seek out or ask for.

My family experienced the lost of a loved one early 2015. It’s an experience of life that we will learn to come to terms with as the time comes, or maybe we’ll never agree to come to terms with it – but it definitely has a way of putting life into perspective.

This weekend brought about a roller coaster of emotions. Attending my grand fathers funeral and reuniting with family under an unfortunate circumstance has been bittersweet. As we each expressed our last words to my hardworking-sweet-ever-loving grandfather, my heart numbed. Though in tears, I felt comfort as I looked around the room, observing everyone that came in and out of the funeral home to pay respect to him. I eavesdropped in multiple conversations in which they retold stories from the past as well as reminisced on how my grandparents raised six loving children, and how my grandfather always had a bias towards the girls in the family (myself included). I looked all around at my extended family, and smiled because my grandparents have created a loving family of over 20 people: six siblings, a number of grand children, and great grand children on their way- it hit me once again:

“The only thing we really truly have in life is each other, the way we treat one another and the love we share. Each interaction, every emotion we give or don’t give, is a fleeting place and time we can never experience again.”

Each and every breathe we take, every moment we experience, and every day we live, they come and go within the blink of an eye. As the weekend progressed, I had a choice to make. My email, articles I continue to save up to read and most importantly, my school work (even though it’s only the second week) continued to pile up. The more I looked at my schedule and assignments, the more stressed I became- but every time I began to worry- my heart took over and reminded me that I was only in town for a few days. School work is important, but in this moment, the incredible family I’m surrounded by takes priority. By family, I don’t mean simply blood related family, anyone can be family, friends, teammates, sometimes even strangers.

By no means am I suggesting that every time you have to choose between work and family, you should ignore work and choose family – but it’s important to recognize that at the end of our lives, it’s the memories and the love we’ve given that will forever stay in the memories of one another.

Lastly, a brilliant quote from my favorite book and author:

“The fact is, there is no foundation, no secure ground, upon which people may stand today if it isn’t the family. If you don’t have the support and love and caring and concern that you get from a family, you don’t have much at all. Love is so supremely important. As our great poet Auden said, ‘Love each other or perish’.”

– Mitch Albom, Tuesdays with Morrie

I ate in Bangkok like it was thanksgiving every day

This year’s Christmas was special. Both my brother and I were back home in Hong Kong and we decided to take a family trip to Bangkok. I’ve been there previously for quick trips, but this was by far my longest time there yet- and it did not disappoint.

Granted, we did not do too much sight seeing in terms of tourist locations, but we walked over 14,000 steps every day throughout the city, and ate so much food my weight averaged about 3 pounds different every day between the morning and night. It is a tad ridiculous, but I’m not complaining at all! The food, whether it be street food, hawker centers, or fancy restaurants- is definitely one to write home about.

The following photo are statues made of condoms. Yup, you read correctly- condoms. It is a restaurant called Cabbage & Condoms. It serves authentic delicious Thai food, but you don’t really go for the food. Go for the atmosphere, the creative art displays made of condoms- and get some free condoms on the way out! C&C is part of an NGO to “promote better understanding and acceptance of family planning” and to promote safe sex. A fun place to visit if you’re in Bangkok!

It was quite foggy all week:

At Central World, one of the biggest shopping malls in Bangkok- was the display of “the universe of happiness” which is basically a display of multiple really adorable Snoopys! How can you ignore them? It’s a great fun activity to bring your children and family to visit. Snap some photos and add it to your photo collection at home!

The final quite touristy, and yet, extremely unique spot in Bangkok is Asiatique. A night market full of artsy crafts, authentic Thai souvenirs, and local Thai snacks here and there- the energy comes from locals and tourists alike. As it is located right by the river, the breeze creates a surreal atmosphere- (the perfect date night location!)

We got the perfect surprise on our final night in Bangkok- Christmas Day. As we sat at Asiatique having some Chang beer and Pad Thai- fireworks arose! It was beyond beautiful to be surrounded by my dearest family, listening to the waves of the river, smelling the scent of fresh air in every breathe, and of course watching the colorful fireworks go off.

My body might be in need of some serious detox, but no regrets at all. I would do it all over again if I could. Sometimes traveling is all about the food- this was one of those times.

Moments of pure joy

When was the last time you felt a moment of pure joy? A moment where your mind stopped wandering with distractions, and you simply smiled knowing everything was perfect at that moment. Sometimes those moments are hard to come by, but that’s what makes them so special.

Perhaps it helps that I have been disconnected from the internet whenever I’m out of the house. It’s been incredible. Although I do get on wifi at some restaurants and bars, for the most part, I have no desire to carry around a phone nor answer messages. Being disconnected has forced me to focus on myself, and observe others as I’m out on the train, or walking down the street.

And notice the beauty of Hong Kong when the sun shines on buildings such as how the photo depicts below:

The other moment of peace and pure joy was at 2:00 AM, as I sat with old and new friends in a bar in Lan Kwai Fong. In the midst of my friends having conversations with each other, I looked around the street and found myself with the biggest smile on my face. It’s been two years since I’ve sat at these chairs, been in this environment. There was so much life around me.

Not to say I don’t feel the same sense of joy when I’m in the States, but that night and that feeling is indescribable. Perhaps if I lived in Hong Kong, I wouldn’t feel the same. It would become the norm, and I may even dislike it because the crowd and late nights can be overwhelming.

But it’s moments like this that is incredibly humbling, to recall my childhood, to remember all those nights I’ve spent in these bars, to realize how fortunate I am to have grown up in a city that everyone has written on their travel bucket list.

What are your joyous moments?

Value the Journey

Traveling across the world, sitting in a plane for over 15 hours is always long. Some people dread the thought of the journey, but I love it. It’s one of my favorite parts of traveling. The amount of things I could get done is almost endless- until my eyes give out and I fall asleep.

This particular flight from LAX to Hong Kong, I managed to watch three films, read more than half of a book I just started, and read a few academic journals for my personal research. The journey was long, my body ached by the time I reached HK, and my eyes were burning of weariness but I couldn’t be happier.

My flight read was called “The Happiness of Pursuit” by New York Times best selling author Chris Guillebeau in which he sets out to visit every country in the world (193 visited) by age Thirty-Five. After completion, he wanted to seek out people in the world who had goals as lofty and wild as his, and as he would put it “pursue a challenging quest.”

He meets strangers from all over the world on their own personal quest. This book is full of phenomenal inspirational stories which will prompt you to think about what your personal quest could be.

One important lesson learnt from the testimonies of these extraordinary people is the importance of the journey. The destination of our goals are life changing, and encouraging to complete our goals- but the moments where we learn and are challenged the most is within the voyage. Guillebeau quotes the following poem (part of it),

Always keep Ithaca on your mind.
To arrive there is your ultimate goal.
But do not hurry the voyage at all.
It is better to let it last for many years;
and to anchor at the island when you are old,
rich with all you have gained on the way,
not expecting that Ithaca will offer you riches

– “Ithaca.” by Constantine Cavafy (1911)

There will be plenty spontaneity and surprises along the way- they may be encouraging- or they could be very challenging- whatever it is, we need to remember to value the journey as much as the destination.

Valuing the journey can be as simple and small as appreciating the 15+ hour journey I had on the flight in which I could do everything I did. Or it can be as big as the journey towards our lifetime quest and goals.

Just a little something to think about. Too often or not, we have to step back from the stresses of the daily life and remember that we are all on a beautiful journey.

Layover in Santa Barbara: even better than I predicted

Never, ever be afraid to strike up a conversation with strangers. What’s the worse that can happen? They may not want to talk, and will then simply find ways to stop the conversation. On the flip side, they want to tell you about themselves, they want to get to know you, and invite you to go sailing with them on the boat they live in.

In my case, the conversation started from a delicious cup of cappuccino.

Let’s backtrack, this past Friday, I drove out to Santa Barbara the night before a Quidditch tournament so I don’t have to wake up at 4 in the morning and travel before a full day of quidditch. Last minute looking for accommodations, I decided the cheapest option would be Air B&B.

If you’ve known me for a while, you’ll know that I’m a huge advocate for Couch Surfing, so Air B&B is a concept that’s a little odd to me- but it was cheap, and the apartment I requested looked really cool.

My stay was phenomenal. My hosts were intelligent, kind, and very welcoming entrepreneurs. Our conversations consisted of movies, science, and how they were in the middle of creating a coffee hand grinder. My favorite part of the house? They had a world map that covered a whole wall- with push pins of where all their Air B&B guests came from. (Put that on my check list of my future apartment)

Anyway, that’s not the point of the story- so let me get back to it. After about the 50th time my stomach decides to growl at me, I decided to find myself some food. Santa Barbara is not a cheap destination, so I wasn’t too uptight on finding a cheap spot. I was, after all, only there for a night.

As I strolled down State Street, I came across a relatively crowded quaint restaurant with a patio overlooking the street: Andersen’s Daniel Bakery & restaurant. It was the perfect place to plop down for a meal, a bit of reading, and people-watching.

It’s never too early for thanksgiving food. Turkey, home made cranberry sauce, Mash potatoes, and sweet potatoes- mmmmmmmm…. that’s all I have to say about that.

It was delicious. I was so, so, so, content with my life at that very moment.

And life only get better.

As the wonderful waiter brought my cappuccino, I heard my restaurant neighbors ask, “Wow. What is that drink? It looks delicious!”. I looked up from learning about the Jedi Academy and responded with the simple answer “cappuccino”.

I have to give credit to Stacy, my restaurant neighbor, for starting our incredible 3 hour long conversation. She was with her husband on what seemed like date night, so I wouldn’t have wanted to disturb them- but they didn’t seem to mind. They were an elderly couple, I’d say perhaps in their 50s.

As the conversation progresses, I learn that they are just passing through Santa Barbara as well. Originally from the East Coast, they were on their way from San Francisco to Mexico on a sail boat and decided to dock in SB for a few days. What an incredible journey. On the other hand, I was in SB for a quidditch tournament- so I guess we both had pretty unique reasons for being there.

Conversation continued for the next 3 hours, about our families, our travel experiences, culture, America, hospitality, and of course- quidditch. It was one of the most refreshing and rejuvenating moments for my soul since I’ve moved to California. With my transition to school, driving, balancing time to see friends and boyfriend- I haven’t had time to really travel, explore and meet strangers like I use to.

Eventually, we exchanged contacts and parted ways with the hope that we will see each other in the near future again. I solely believe that the universe has a way of bringing people together.

“The night I met Stacy and Robert” is definitely one for the books. I hope I was able to inspire them as much as they inspired me, even if it was simply the rules and community of Quidditch. (Trust me, they were very intrigued.)

P.S. When I spoke to them on the phone yesterday, Stacy was talking to me while observing a hurd of 100+ dolphins swim by their boat. Amazing. Absolutely amazing.