My heart aches…

There are times at church where my mind is off somewhere else, or I try my best to listen but I just don’t enjoy it as much as I should. Today was an example of that. Maybe because today’s sermon didn’t apply to me as much. It was about money, a while back. Tobin preached a sermon on money as well and that created confusion and dislike of the church from some people. But nevermind that, it was nice to be at church, seeing everyone praising and singing to God in unison.

There was one song which made my heart ache. That song is called “Lord I give you my heart”.  Just from the song name, it makes me cringe. That is what I’m suppose to do but am I doing it around the clock? Thinking back a while ago when Tim LaTour’s family came over my house for dinner. I had a conversation with Tim and he challenged me with the question, How do you make sure you are close to God twenty-four seven?

Think about that for a moment. It’s tough. Till now, I can’t find a set answer to that question. There are always more you can do. When that song played, I started singing like I usually do every other song.

Lord I give you my heart
I give you my soul
I live for you alone
Every breath I take,
Every moment I’m awake,
Lord have your way in me.

Everytime I get to that verse, everytime I sing the first line. My heart aches and I cringe. At times, my mouth just stop moving and I can’t sing it no matter how hard I try. The more I think about it, the reason is because it’s not what I have been doing, so how can I sing it like I do? At the times when I think of Him, everything is with him and everything I do is for him. But 70% of my life, is spent giving my heart out to something else, something materialistic, computer, school, boys, and things not worthy of my heart.

Giving Him my whole heart is the first thing I have to do if I want to live a God-centered life. It is something we all struggle with and need improvments on. I pray the next time I sing that song, I will be able to sing it loud and clear. To let God know that I’m doing what I’m saying and I love him with all my heart.



Even two hours after we played basketball, I am still in my room smiling and laughing. My mom must think I am a freak. The school day was alright, nothing special. But playing basketball at the American Club with 6 of my friends makes my day like no other. This is the second time we have played 3 on 3 at the AC. It is some intense running and basketball, and yet we crack jokes, we laugh at each other almost every minute. With us all fumbling the ball, falling on each other, screaming to scare our opponents, two people jumping for the ball and no one else there and yet it still somehow goes in between us and we totally miss the ball, making someone laugh so hard it hurts, and so much more.

There are no words to describe how much fun I had. I didn’t think about anything except playing basketball and enjoying the moment with those friends. It is something I will remember forever. When we all graduate from college and meet up for a drink, the conversation will start with “Remember that time she just fell on the ground while walking around on the court? And her excuse was – my legs collasped.” It is so nice to be able to look around with all my friends laughing so hard they end up on the floor. I thank all of you – you know who you are – who played today, for making my day. We should make this a weekly routine. You guys are great.


P.s. This makes me laugh..

jessy (
» yeah its just too bad i can’t spread all my coolness
» somehow, no matter how hard i try, it just can’t rub off onto other people!
» sometimes it makes me feel bad, its like i’m hogging all the coolness! i guess             coolness is one of those things that people just have to creat for themselves.

-_=C(-)R!$=_- (
» jessy is too cool for school

jessy (
» and yes, i’m a beast that is too cool for school

Jo |
» ha ha. see you tomorrow jessy who’s too cool for school!
jessy (
» no i’m a BEAST that is too cool for school
Jo |
» oh.. i’m sorry

Staring at the screen..

I’m a little worn out. I’m sitting here chatting and basically typing 5 words per minute. My eyes are shutting on me but it has been a good day. Second day of school, was not too bad. I was tired and sore all day today I have to admit. That’s the result of doing such intense exercise the night before. Waking up this morning was tough, getting myself out of bed was even tougher. It has been good hanging with a new friend at school, catching up with old friends and teachers.

In the past few days, the weather has been great. I wake up each morning, head out for breakfast and look out to my balcony, see the bright blue sky with white clouds and the beautiful ocean with the reflection of the sun beaming down. It is nice and hot out, towards the evening, even with a little breeze. It is so nice. One of these days, I will have to go swimming, ly down at the pool, read a book and listen to music. I can’t wait till the book I ordered from arrives.

Ow. My legs are sore all over. I went for a run tonight again, also had a nice chat with J. It was real good to catch up and talk again. After my run, I went to the gym and used all the equipments that I usually use. I did more sets than I usually would as well. All in the span of 10 minutes or less. I am excited to wake up tomorrow and see if I can still move my legs…

I was talking to a friend today. He has been moving around his whole life and I said that must be hard but you must be kind of use to it. He said “Who would ever get use to moving?” I felt sorrow in his words. I can never imagine moving so soon. It must seem like once you get to a place, just as you get to know your friends and get close to them, you have to jet again. I’m lucky that I have been here my whole life and able to stay here until University. I’m lucky to have friends from primary school that are still here with me. I’m lucky I don’t have to say goodbye to my hometown, to where I grew up in. I’m so thankful for everything that I have.


I might have been a little out of shape…

So get this. I went out to exercise today. But it was completly unplanned. I mean unplanned as in, I had to do it after school, after a nap, and after homework. Which I am pretty proud of that I actually did homework, after school. I don’t think this trend will last that long afterwards but that is not the point.

The point is, I went to play badminton tonight at 7pm and I played for two hours. Now you may ask yourself, who the hell plays badminton for two hours. Well I did. And it was no easy task. But with the words, of my father echoing in my head “JO EXERCISE” I was ok, lets run some suicides. Ha. I’m going to be so fit, after this is over.

So I bid my friends goodbye, and head back to the bus stop of whatever there is that can take me home. And I realised that noone is going to take my sweaty ass home today, cause I smell, look like a wreck and am tired.

So I fashioned this brilliant and foolproof idea that would take me home fast and wouldn’t bother too many people.

I Ran Home.

Yes, after hours of badminton, running suicides, I did the only thing a insane person would do. I ran home. My legs are tired. And I am worn out. I know for a fact I will be soo sore that my brain will shut down, and I will collapse in a heap or fain and lack of energy in the middle of Lunch.

In hindsight, I may have been a little dumb to think I could do all that and be alright.


The Parrot Sketch

In life, there are a few things that Ican honestly say that will make me drop down and roll on the floor and laugh like an idiot. Not that I do not normally, but in this case, it’s just brilliant. I am ofcourse talking about Monty Python. And if you do not know them already here is a sketch about a Parrot in a bet shop. Inspired by none other than, the previous entry.

Take in to fact that before, ther was In Living Color, Mad TV, or Saturday Night Live, it was all Monty Python’s Flying Circus.


C: ‘Ello, Miss?
Owner: What do you mean “miss”?
C: <pause> I’m sorry, I have a cold.  I wish to make a complaint!
O: We’re closin’ for lunch.
C: Never mind that, my lad.  I wish to complain about this parrot what I
purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.
O: Oh yes, the, uh, the Norwegian Blue…What’s,uh…What’s wrong with it?
C: I’ll tell you what’s wrong with it, my lad. ‘E’s dead, that’s what’s
wrong with it!
O: No, no, ‘e’s uh,…he’s resting.
C: Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I’m looking
at one right now.
O: No no he’s not dead, he’s, he’s restin’!  Remarkable bird, the Norwegian
Blue, idn’it, ay?  Beautiful plumage!
C: The plumage don’t enter into it.  It’s stone dead.
O: Nononono, no, no!  ‘E’s resting!
C: All right then, if he’s restin’, I’ll wake him up!
(shouting at the cage)
‘Ello, Mister Polly Parrot!  I’ve got a lovely fresh cuttle fish for you if
you show…(owner hits the cage)
O: There, he moved!
C: No, he didn’t, that was you hitting the cage!
O: I never!!
C: Yes, you did!
O: I never, never did anything…
C: (yelling and hitting the cage repeatedly) ‘ELLO POLLY!!!!!
Testing! Testing!  Testing!  Testing!  This is your nine o’clock alarm call!

(Takes parrot out of the cage and thumps its head on the counter.  Throws it up
in the air and watches it plummet to the floor.)

C: Now that’s what I call a dead parrot.
O: No, no…..No, ‘e’s stunned!
O: Yeah!  You stunned him, just as he was wakin’ up!  Norwegian Blues
stun easily, major.
C: Um…now look…now look, mate, I’ve definitely ‘ad enough of this.
That parrot is definitely deceased, and when I purchased it not ‘alf an hour
ago, you assured me that its total lack of movement was due to it bein’
tired and shagged out following a prolonged squawk.
O: Well, he’s…he’s, ah…probably pining for the fjords.
C: PININ’ for the FJORDS?!?!?!?  What kind of talk is that?, look, why
did he fall flat on his back the moment I got ‘im home?
O: The Norwegian Blue prefers keepin’ on it’s back!  Remarkable bird, id’nit,
squire?  Lovely plumage!
C: Look, I took the liberty of examining that parrot when I got it home,
and I discovered the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in
the first place was that it had been NAILED there.


O: Well, o’course it was nailed there!  If I hadn’t nailed that bird down,
it would have nuzzled up to those bars, bent ’em apart with its beak, and
VOOM!  Feeweeweewee!
C: “VOOM”?!?  Mate, this bird wouldn’t “voom” if you put four million volts
through it!  ‘E’s bleedin’ demised!
O: No no!  ‘E’s pining!
C: ‘E’s not pinin’!  ‘E’s passed on!  This parrot is no more!  He has ceased
to be!  ‘E’s expired and gone to meet ‘is maker!  ‘E’s a stiff!  Bereft
of life, ‘e rests in peace!  If you hadn’t nailed ‘im to the perch ‘e’d be
pushing up the daisies!  ‘Is metabolic processes are now ‘istory!  ‘E’s off
the twig!  ‘E’s kicked the bucket, ‘e’s shuffled off ‘is mortal coil, run
down the curtain and joined the bleedin’ choir invisibile!!


O: Well, I’d better replace it, then.